The View From the Hospital Bed

August has returned from home and finally, I have my laptop, bible, prayer books - in essence - all my lifelines.

I so appreciate Marina putting the news on here - although I'm not sure I'm a big fan of that picture!

First an explanation about the name Jakie Pat. Back in December, before we knew our baby's gender, August's sister, Monica, coined the name "Jakie Pat" for our baby since both "Jackie" and "Pat" are two of those ambiguous names that can go either way. We all laughed and laughed at the name and it has stuck ever since. Please be assured, that is NOT his name.

To say this day has been surreal doesn't even describe it. I remember being the OB nurse - monitoring patients, watching for contractions, administering Terbutaline. I wasn't supposed to ever BE one of those patients. I was due to go back for another ultrasound in two weeks to check the status of the previa. I was certain it would be resolved. It was supposed to be a non-issue! None of this was on the agenda - bleeding, bedrest, shots upon shots of this and that medication. But life has gotten in the way.

So now we all have to figure out how to live in the center of what the Lord has for us - fully embracing Him in it as He embraces us. I really don't know what that looks like yet - and it makes me tired right now to try and figure it out. I suspect for today and tomorrow and the next day it will come down to doing the next thing- uttering the next prayer, catching the next nap, enduring the next shot.

I'm two days shy of 31 weeks. This little guy is just too young to come yet. Pray that we can gain at least another week, or two, or three. Thanks, friends.

How thankful I am to know a God that does not change. The past few weeks have definitely reminded me that, although there's so much we think we can bank on, there's really very little that won't disappoint us. How crucial it is for us (I mean that as a collective all of us since I know many are dealing with trials of their own.) to choose to cling to that which does not disappoint.

Oh my Jesus, forgive us our sins, save us from the fires of hell. Lead all souls to heaven, especially those in my need of Thy mercy. (Oh, Jesus, how we all need your mercy today. Be generous to us.)