Holy Week: Civil War Reconstruction or the Cross?

August and I made a decision earlier this week which has brought much joy to our children. One evening, during our family devotions, we read these words of Jesus from the Gospel of John.

"You always have the poor with you, but you do not always have me."

Hmmm.......that really got my attention. You see, not knowing when this baby may come or how many days I'll spend in the hospital between now and then, it has been my intent to cram in as much school as we can every day. And yet, here we find ourselves in Holy Week, anticipating the Resurrection, and not wanting to miss out on any bit of grace God has for us in it. I'm not implying that the two must be mutually exclusive, but for me, at this particular season, I know that they are. I don't believe our celebration of the Resurrection is meant to be one moment in time but rather an ongoing experience of worship and transformation. Therefore, going back to one of my favorite Laura Berquist quotes, "Formation is more important than information," we have put away the math, grammar, and history books for the week. We've decided, rather than watching Holy Week pass us by, we will actively engage in it, walking the road to the cross with Jesus. I suspect, not only will it be WAY more fun than Civil War Reconstruction, but it will also bear far more eternal fruit.

There is a wonderful centuries old observance called Stations of the Cross (also sometimes referred to as the "Way of the Cross"). The Stations are a series of 14 images representing events on Jesus's road from Pilate's house to the Cross. Interestingly, Mel Gibson's movie "The Passion of the Christ", out several years ago, was based on the Stations of the Cross. Since I am really only just becoming familiar with this ancient devotion, I went hunting online to understand it better. I found some really helpful articles here (The Stations of the Cross and Other Devotions to the Passion) and here (The Cross as a Journey: The Stations of the Cross for Protestant Worship) about this devotion. I had already been thinking the Stations would be a wonderful way to prepare our hearts for Easter when I received a box full of craft supplies from Jen at Wildflowers and Marbles to make mini-Stations for inside our home!

So Tuesday we covered our family room rug with newspapers and that space became craft central. (Can I just say how much out of my comfort zone having tacky glue in the family room places me!!) I stayed on my usual perch while the girls went to town gluing and creating. Smiles, giggles, and singing (with Meredith Andrews) abounded and I'm glad to report there were no glue catastrophes!

My camera battery was dying so I had no flash for most of these photos. They are also taken primarily from only one vantage point - MINE - since I don't move much. Also, I know we could have moved the laundry baskets out of the family room prior to taking the photos but instead we decided to keep it real for you. Come on along on our journey towards Easter!

Since every worthwhile project needs a Project Manager, Marina stepped up to the plate.












I was delighted to hear Eliza counting her popsicle sticks by 2's!









Oh, and once (just one time!) I moved to the other couch so I could also get pictures of Juliette. (No scolding in the comments box if you notice the different camera angle.)

One down, thirteen to go!

Project complete!

Tomorrow evening (Friday), once the sun goes down, we will turn off all the lights in the house and light all 14 votives. One by one, we'll read and meditate on these 14 events leading up to Jesus's death. After each scene, we will pray together and then extinguish that candle. Upon extinguishing the 14th candle, we will be in complete darkness, waiting in anticipation for the Light that is the Resurrected Jesus at Easter.

August is Now Collar-less!!!

August had a follow-up x-ray last week so that Dr. Young could assess the healing at the surgery site. Tonight at dinner, Dr. Young (who may just be my second favorite doctor ever) called to say the healing looks great and August is released from any further collar wearing!!! Since neither August nor I are in any position to do happy dances, we instead let out plenty of loud whoops and hollers - all of course from a very, very still position. Although it seems like a small thing, being free of his collar is great encouragement to this sweet man with so many other burdens weighing on him right now. It sort of feels like one tiny step towards normalcy in the midst of all the madness.......and hugs just aren't the same with the collar in the way. He's also now free to gently hit some tennis balls with the girls although he'll have to wait another 6 weeks to do any heavy hitting. Thanks so very much for all the prayers you've said for him. It's so good to have him healthy again.

34 weeks and holding......at least for now

Sorry for this belated 34 week celebration post but, for reasons that I'll explain, I just didn't have it in me to get on here and write anything yesterday. Marina and August both did really great jobs at explaining the scenario of the past two days. It started off as pretty much a repeat of the first time - awake at 4:30 a.m. to a pool of blood, rush to the hospital, baby looks fine and then here's where the two stories begin to differ. This time my contractions just would not stop so I ended up on IV Magnesium Sulfate for 24 hours (although I'll tell you it felt like 24 days). I'll forever refer to that stuff as "Influenza-in-a-bag" because that's really how it makes you feel - like you have the flu. Just imagine the worst you've ever felt - uncomfortable, restless, nauseated, clammy, weak, lethargic - and you can relate to my experience. (I didn't even want my laptop from home. Those of you who know me well understand how bad I felt!)

I'm happy to say I'm at home now - SO happy to say I'm at home. The contractions have stopped. I feel good (that's a relative term but compared to yesterday I feel good). August says it's great to have me back. (He said that on the phone on his way to pick me up at the hospital so I'm sure it had something to do with me acting and looking like death warmed over yesterday.)

The docs seem confidant that if the baby were to come now, he would probably do fine. Especially since I got steroid injections to speed up the development of his lungs during my first hospitalization. That's reassuring to know. Still, I know he couldn't be in any better place right now so I'm doing my best to comply even more to the doctor's order to stay still. I had a lot of contractions on Friday and Saturday and they think that's why this happened. I'll admit I probably had gotten a bit overly confidant, as my "bathroom trips" were straying farther and farther off the beaten path.

Here are a few respite ruminations I'll share:

• For our next baby (excuse me for a moment while I go pick August up off the floor) I want to deliver here. (You'll need to scroll down to see the beautiful birthing rooms.)
• You may have noticed in the left sidebar, that I added our virtue for April - charity. Initially the intent was that we would work on loving each other and the people around us better. What better virtue for this, the month of our Lord's Resurrection?! (We've done some neat activities in that vain that I'll try to share about soon.) However, already, I'm discovering it's also about learning to receive love as well. We have been on the receiving end BIG TIME recently. Just now, two care packages and a Whole Foods gift card, meant to be used for our Easter celebration, arrived in the mail. We're all overwhelmed. Also, at this moment, my two biggest girls are at their piano lessons, transported to and fro each week by a faithful friend. Another friend is bringing dinner tonight while another has offered to shop for me. I could really go on and on and on. Just know that my heart is overflowing and I will be forever grateful.
  
• This next thought is a note I wish I'd had the energy to write yesterday....although it's probably better that I didn't! Dear Ms. Nursing Instructor, Being a nurse myself, and therefore understanding the value of the hands-on experience a student receives when caring for patients, I can appreciate that you probably thought mine was an interesting and unusual case from which your student could gain great experience. Your student seemed eager and ready to learn. In fact, I'm sure Ed was a very nice guy. He was quite friendly as he sauntered into my room and began explaining to me about the various clinical uses of Magnesium Sulfate in the pregnant woman. But the fact is, I'd had all the "surprises" I could take for one day and would have appreciated your checking with me first before sending Ed into my room as I lay there in only my hospital gown. Sincerely yours, A Very Stressed Out and Highly Medicated Pregnant Woman
• My friends are great cooks. My arsenal of yummy recipes always grows during times such as this.
• Why is it when I decide each spring and fall to tackle the change over/pass down of seasonal clothes with the girls it takes us weeks to finally complete. Yet, when their Daddy does it, it takes 2 hours?!
  
• Just when I think I finally understand what it means to surrender all to God, He sends me yet another lesson. I always assumed if I bled again, the baby would be delivered. This last scenario wasn't one I had ever even considered. I had planned all the various possibilities out in my mind and Magnesium Sulfate was in none of them. Frankly, I much prefer it that way!
• We are now in Holy Week - the last precious days leading up to Easter. I've been pondering what it looks like to celebrate Easter from the couch. Our family has certain special traditions that we like to observe during this holy time of year. But most of those aren't conducive to couch sitting. We've received some ideas and treats from some very thoughtful and faith-filled folks from afar. So although this will be a very different Holy Week and Easter, I'm confidant it has the makings for some very, very special memories. In fact, there's something seemingly very sacred about celebrating new life as a new little life grows within me.
  

Family Visit

Martha has not felt well today because of the Magnesium Sulfate. It makes her feel nauseated, have headaches, blurry vision, and flushing. Terbutaline was also added because of continued contractions. Fortunately, the bleeding has stopped. Her hematocrit (blood count) on admission was 29 (it was 31 on her last admission and fell to 25 on discharge). The baby sounds great; he's very active and has a great heart rate.
I went home to have lunch with the girls, and now we are visiting her before church. She's quite groggy on the medications. My mom stepped in and cooked us a nice Indonesian meal tonight. Unfortunately, Martha doesn't have much of an appetite. Maybe we can deliver her some of this home cooked meal when she feels a little better.
Thanks for your continued prayers.

August

More Prayers for Mom

Mama's back in the hospital.

She started bleeding today around 4:40 am. She is also contracting, and that is very bad. She probably won't have a c-section. Mom says that if she were a week further along the doctor would go ahead and do the c-section. The doctors and nurses have started Mom on a new IV medicine- Magnesium Sulfate. This is supposed to help her stop contractions, but it might make her feel "lousy" and nauseated. They might take her off of it in the morning.

It is possible that Mom could come home tomorrow. We will all pray and hope she can.

~Marina, for all of us girls here

An April Shower of Photos!

I love this idea I found here of posting photos of things that make me smile. It is so good for my heart to focus on what I do have rather than what I don't, i.e. mobility! Everything looks brighter around here when I smile. I think this fun meme will be just the thing to help me do that.

I'm with this bunch a LOT and boy do they make me smile........and laugh and cry and.....well....you get the picture. Hopefully I bless them as much as they bless me!!

Apparently my resistant reader has finally found a book worth keeping her nose in. This makes me really smile because it has been a looooooong time coming. Great job, Eliza!

Couch Chronicles - Vol. 5

Has Rachel Ray moved into my house?

Before lunch yesterday:

Rachel-Ray-wannabe: "Greek salad is one of my FAVORITE salads. You can either wash your lettuce beforehand or place it in the spinner and rinse it there. Then you'll want to add some baby carrots (etc., etc., etc.)......"

{long quiet pause}

A member of her "studio audience": "Why aren't you talking?"

Rachel-Ray-wannabe: "It's a commercial break."

I know it may sound like we've been watching way too much Food Network but we really haven't. Really! Someone just has a very vivid imagination and some lofty culinary dreams.